Saturday, 29 October 2011

MY Blog

Hmmm - this is a post I have been contemplating for a while now. It hadn't been written before now, partly due to tiredness and lack of time and partly because I needed to make peace with it myself.

I noticed when I changed blogs and started over at my 'new' blog (this one), a lot of 'my followers' chose not to follow me over. This was despite the repeated reminders and regular mentions of it leading up to the change-over, and following it for a few months. There were links, and there were posts - well; basically I made it EASY-PEASY to know all about it, and what to do about it (hey, I figured if you knew enough to 'follow' me the first time, I wouldn't need to spoon-feed to that extent the second time)!

But despite all the plea's and desperate reminders - I remained relatively follower-free for a long while (other than family and friends - thanks guys). Slowly others have since joined me though, new folks - people whose blogs I admire, it is always a thrill to see I have a new follower; probably more thrilling to me than it should be, truth be known. 

I have 'discovered' newer bloggers than me up at the 60-70 follower mark, and yet I have done everything by the book - I have spent hours reading other peoples blogs and commenting, hours writing up posts about 'interesting' stuff, joined linky's and wrote regularly, became a member of 'KMB' - blah, blah, blah. This bugged me a lot, and I started to question everything... and it has taken a long time to really decide whether or not to continue with blogging, change my style, change what I blog about - whether or not I was even interested in carrying on. It really did hit me harder than I had anticipated (hhhhm, insecurity issues here to deal with - nah)!!!!!!!

However, I realised the other day that I'm okay with it now... this is MY blog, and I am going to write whatever I want to write. I know I wrote 'like' this in my intro - but that was before I even knew there were other NZ Bloggers, before I understood what 'followers' were, before I even knew how to leave comments for other people - let alone began expecting to get them back. It has been hard to go back to that naive time in my life where I wrote for the love of it; I wrote to communicate; to share our little family with extended family and friends... where it didn't matter who read it or if they left messages or not (haha - I make it sound like I am SO old and experienced now; 'naive time if my life...' *grin*)

I have discovered that people are just the same in 'blogland' as they are in real life... there are cliques; popular crowds, leaders who make the decisions, people who follow those leaders, and of course the little 'wanna-be's' like me! But that's okay - I have decided I don't want to be a 'wanna-be' anymore... I want to be ME!

So folks - I won't be joining in linky's on a regular basis anymore, I might do posts along a similiar line; but I'll write it up when I have time, and not wait to link it in appropriately. I am going to seriously thin my reading list. I have already stopped commenting on most blogs as I just don't have the time, energy or patience to be bothered anymore. I am going to write about whatever I want to; and if this means MORE posts about Button (making me a one-dimensional person); then so-be-it! I am going write up a list of idea's for posts in the future (I have so run out of inspiration lately), and I am going to try and be more 'real' and forget about 'blog-etiquette'.

I am not a follower, I never have been and am not sure why I started becoming one recently... I am ME, and I think it's time the real me surfaced again.


PS - Hope that didn't scare you away, as I may end up needing therapy if I lost more followers *grin*!!!!!

10 comments :

Lien - allnewadventures said...

Elizabeth, this is an extremely honest and confessional post - I applaud you for writing it as no doubt it has been a weight that needed to be lifted.

I'll stop by again when I have more time to properly peruse your slice of the interwebs.

Lien

http://www.allnewadventures.com

Vintage Mum said...

having a little giggle here because I know exactly where you are at. I struggled with this last year, you are right on the money about there being cliques (I was just talking about this to a friend the other night)but in the end a blog is just an online diary of sorts. I've just 'weeded'my reading list of almost 500 blogs down to 90, even then I wouldn't visit all of them every time they post. I use google reader so half the time I wouldn't even needed to go to thier blog.
So chiin up, keep doing what you're doing and your follower list will slowly build up again :)

Anonymous said...

Love it, love it, love it! You go girl. I'm very time poor lately so I have to be 'precious' about what I spend time reading however there is a valuable lesson in this post about remaining authentic in life no matter what. Thanks for reminding me...

Stacia said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Helen said...

Blogging is indeed VERY cliquey and I understand your struggle - one of the questions I often get asked is "how do I increase my blog following?" or "how can I get more readers?" and I'm all - huh? Do these people think I have followers? Madness! I would have no idea what it's like to have 100+ followers (I'm NOWHERE close). It used to get me down, but not so much anymore. I do what you do - I post for me now, and try and forget the rest. If I get a comment here and there it's wonderful and gives me a thrill, but mostly I write so my boys will have something to look back on.

I love your blog. I think you are genuine and honest and lovely. Every comment you leave for me means the world. So thank you. And keep being you. :)

MaxineD said...

You go girl - I have decided that followers don't increase my self-worth, only God can do that properly, the rest is just ego stroking!!
Love you
Blessings
M
p.s. it's good to see you here again - I do enjoy your blog posts.

Ange (Tall, Short and Tiny) said...

Great post - it's so nice to read a really honest entry.
Totally agree that the blogging community is like real life with cliques and in-crowds; I read somewhere that mummy bloggers are the worst when it comes to this, which is so silly.
I enjoy your posts because they are real and lovely and different to what everyone else seems to be doing (and your daughter is such a cutie!)....however, I'm TERRIBLE at becoming an official "follower". *I* know I read your blog, but unless I comment *you* don't know it, and I think there are loads of others the same.
Keep blogging for yourself, because I reckon you do a pretty darn good job xx

Cat said...

*smiles* I LOVE and ADMIRE your honesty in this post.
We've talked over and over my personal struggle with blogging and the etiquette and the cliques and the popular and the un popular and how it makes us (you me others) feel . . . I was just discussing this 'again' the other night with another blogger who like yourself has become a 'real life FRIEND' (read comments above and put 2 & 2 together)
You blog from the heart and that is what is important.
Keep on being you - xxx

Miriam said...

Elizabeth - great post I'm glad you blog. I have no idea about followers and everything else but my journey has been to develop 'My' voice and not try to be any one else on my blog.

Amy said...

Hey Elizabeth,
Ah, it is nice to see you again. And I mean "YOU" not just that you are blogging, but that these are things that are on your mind, in your heart, meaningful and personal. I love reading your thoughts, seriously and truly and hope that you keep writing what is important to you (and enjoying the comments that do come too, of course!). I'll be trying to do the same - be ME, while you be YOU.
Love Amy
xo